Being an empath: my reactions/responses to the 30 traits of being an empath
30 traits of an Empath (How to know if you're an Empath)
All my life, I’ve felt different. Like I was an alien & that the traits I had didn’t fit. While some people had some of my traits, no one had all of them. I always felt like no one understood how I was the way I was, including myself.
While talking with my roommate, she told me i was an empath. I had heard of empathy and knew it was one of my top 5 strengths, I had never heard that term before as a noun, so I looked it up. I stumbled upon this blog post and had the weirdest reaction; i started crying. I usually don’t cry when reading online articles, but I just never had been explained so well and understood.
So to really digest this, I’m going to go through each definition of the empath this post was describing and compare it against myself and explain how/if it connected with me.
All quotes are from this blog post from 2013 entitled " http://themindunleashed.com/2013/10/30-traits-of-empath.html
I’ve always known since I was a child that I had a strong sense of others. I was pretty selfish as a child as I liked being the center of attention and thought the world revolved around me. As I got older, I became less that way and really focused on the people around me. My mom always said I was a “sponge” of others emotions and I really did get impacted by the emotions around me, especially in my family. I like the line “You either are an empath or you aren’t. It’s not a trait that is learned”. I feel that is so true, I never learned this, nor did I really want to be this way.
I agree with this 100%. It’s hard for me to take compliments, even though I love them and don’t always believe them. I am open and frank about certain things and hate hiding feelings & thoughts from friends and family. I don’t like to hide anything or keep secrets.
I can go off the grid and not want to deal with people sometimes. This is especially true in my invertedness at times. I don’t respond to emails when I feel overwhelmed by them.
I’m definitely a peacemaker who puts others first. I told my roommate that my worst fear is being in an awkward/uncomfortable situation because I hate confrontation so I like to keep the peace at all times. I’m a total avoider of conflict/issues, which is why I like to stay out of drama. I love to watch drama on TV if I have no input into it myself.
Without a doubt, this emotional withholding can be detrimental to one’s health, for the longer one’s thoughts and/or emotions aren’t released, the more power they build. The thoughts and/or emotions can eventually becoming explosive, if not crippling. The need to express oneself honestly is a form of healing and a choice open to all. To not do so can result in a breakdown of the person and result in mental/emotional instability or the creation of a physical ailment, illness or disease.
This is one that I sort of agree/disagree with, while I hate seeing acts of violence (Pan’s Labyrinth was ruined for me because of the violence), I’m fascinated by crime shows and solving mysteries but don’t enjoy the details of the crime, more of the wanting to know what/how something happened.
I love working with people, not so much animals/nature. While I like those, they just aren’t my passion. I love volunteering and have been on many mission trips
From a young age, I loved playing with dolls as well as watching movies/tv because of the stories. I went to film school to tell stories. I do have a huge imagination & am a researcher at heart. I’m definitely an old romantic.
The second part, this one blew my mind out the door. I’ve always, always been fascinated by family history, to the point of going to ancestry events, getting my DNA tested, watching shows like “Finding my Roots” & “Who do you think you are” and so much more. Spending hours on ancestry.com tracking down people, dates & locations. This is crazy!
I have always been musical, from a young age. I grew up singing & was in many choirs & band throughout middle, high school & college.
In high school, there were certain songs that really impacted me with their lyrics. So I understand that warning!
I was a huge theatre nerd, acting in plays from a young age into high school. I also use my hands a lot when I talk and have always been drawn to the performing arts.
I’ve been told that people are drawn to me. My issue is keeping people around once that has worn off...
I can have deep conversations with people I’ve just met. It’s easy for me to start a conversation with someone and connect quickly
I totally feel this one! People describe me as those first few listed above but I also feel like encompass the dark ones too! I can switch my mood quickly based on what others think of me!
I feel this one so much. I really believe my thoughts/feelings are mine when usually they are a reaction of what’s going around me with others. I like the last part, as doing this blog post is helping me to realize more about myself than I ever have in my life.
I recently told my mom about this. I cannot stand to not have an answer, it will literally drive me nuts! That’s why I’m a good investigator-I won’t stop until I find the answer, even if it takes me years. It’s also hard when someone vents to me, I have to have a solution and try to “fix it”, but sometimes people just want sympathy. I cannot just do that.
Example: I was searching the internet for a computer game I used to play as a kid and couldn’t remember the name of. It took me over 2 years of sporatic searches but I finally found it and felt such a relief!
I have always dreamt but it was never something that I looked too deeply into. I feel like they were realistic and incorporated elements of my life but sometimes made no sense.
I agree with this. I can get bored easily and cannot stand lessons/lectures where I already know the information. I need to be stimulated most of the time and I usually find it in online videos.
I am a hands on learner for sure. I need to be shown and test things out to enjoy/learn things. I like acting but haven’t done it in a long time.
I love feeling a connection and do feel deja vu at times but always am scared by it and think “this is deja vu” until it goes away.
I don’t really agree with this, unless it relates to spirituality and religion.
I do remember times in my life when there are signs from god pointing me in a specific direction!
Again, more about spirituality/religion
Here are 30 of the most common traits:
“1. Knowing: Empaths just know stuff, without being told. It’s a knowing that goes way beyond intuition or gut feelings, even though that is how many would describe the knowing. The more attuned they are the stronger this gift becomes.”
I do feel this way
I totally agree with this. While I love the Minnesota state fair, I hate the crowds that accompany it. That was the main reason I decided not to move to LA, too many people around!
This I can see as well & the reason I figured out I was an empath. Feelings/emotions are easy for me to pick up on, but yet it's hard for me to understand what people are thinking.
Again like mentioned before, I don't like tv or the news. I do like fictional drama & TV is something I love.
This is something I'm ok at but not great. I can be pretty gullible but not altogether naive & I'm getting better at figuring out a lie, but not great at it.
This is not something I deal with as I'm a pretty healthy person, thank goodness.
Without being TMI I did have some digestive issues as a child. I also have back issues and bone spurs but not sure if they are related to this.
This is me to a T. I always try to help those who need help, almost to a fault, without putting my needs in there.
While I feel like I feel emotions, I don't feel like I'm a great listener/shoulder to cry on.
I don't feel tired too often, mostly because I work out and get enough sleep.
This is something that has always affected me. I literally never did any of the above mentioned because I know that they would affect me. I mostly use the internet/computer/TV as my addictive personality because those are safer than others.
This goes along with being a christian, I'm a very spiritual person who is open to beliefs.
I'm definitely all of the above, I've always been super creative and have done all of the above.
Disagree with this one. I love animals and nature, but aren't my biggest passion.
Yes! I've had to share a bedroom with roommates at times and it drove me nuts. I need my online time!
Yep, as mentioned before I get distracted easily! Like ADD almost.
Yes! I would never find a job I hated-it drives me nutes!
I would never find a job where my strengths aren't utilized.
Wow! Me too a T again! I'm such a researcher. I follow everything I can, but recently have gotten information overload & have started unfollowing everything to get piece of mind.
I like to travel alot! But I also like doing fun things around town!
True and false. I like being clean, but it's hard for me to keep up!
I love to do this but don't always have the time/energy.
Yes! I hate jobs that feel constricting without creative license.
I've always had a few pounds that have never been able to get, no matter how much I exercise. This is super interesting to me!
I think this is half true, I do only share certain things with certain people.
I do not like people who are full of themselves.
I do feel this very much!
This is partially true. I love buying secondhand but only a few things. I do like having new things though!
Definetly not true. LOL
I believe this happens sometimes. I can disguise my emotions but only for a short time.
“If you can say yes to most or all of the above then you are most definitely an empath.”
“Empaths are having a particularly difficult time at the present time, picking up on all the negative emotions that are being emanated into the world from the populace.”
Does any of this resonant? Does this surprise you about me? So interesting!